Introvert

It's nice to open up a little to people. And it's even more nice when they actually understand what I say. So I think, you people deserve some credit.

I consider myself introvert as I prefer to be alone than being around people. I was never chatty and I don't do small talk, because I just can't. Some people think it's weird and a friend told me today that doing small talk might make the other person feel better, and it might lift their spirits for the day or for the rest of the week. I think this friend of mine is right. It made me feel really bad about myself because I usually don't care what other people say and just kinda zone out not paying attention.

But is it selfish to do things for yourself not caring if other gets anything from it or not?
Should I do small talk just to make others feel better even if I don't like it? A part of me shouts yes but the other part of me says that it is too much of an effort and I don't know... I recall situations when I just could not say anything about that matter that one was talking about. I just didn't have any interest in that subject. Bit embarrassing.
I'd rather be on my own, away from people if I could. With a book. And coffee. Outside somewhere in Mother Nature enjoying the sunshine.

But anyway, it was nice that someone was actually listening to me and understood me so I am kind of grateful.
And for the future me, I think I have to change. A bit. Starting tomorrow.